I concluded two things today.
The first; If I had tits, girl tits, not even nice girl tits, not the flaps of man blubber I currently possess. I shouldn’t blab about what a disgusting tub of flab I am-, that rhymed, I know some of my chick friends read this, and I don’t think I need to be reinforcing upon them the fact that I’m a disgusting human being.
Anyway, if I had tits, girl tits, I’d be totally terrified of them popping out. Like, if I had tits, I could never wear a two piece, and how boobs don’t just slip out of those is a mystery to me. But now, as a dude, that’s pretty fucking awesome, ’cause when I see a chick in a two piece, in my mind, I am always like, one lean-over away from seeing a free nipple, which is awesome! But even in a one piece, if I had girl tits, I’d be afraid of them poppin’ out the side. I don’t know how I would ever go to a beach if I were a chick, probably the same way I do now, which is by not going, ever. So I don’t know, I don’t what would change for me if I had tits, other than being a chick.
The second; I totally want to get high and watch all of Firefly, back to back, in one sitting. The more I think about Firefly, the more I dig that show, I haven’t even been re-watching it, just been computing it in my brain. And for some reason, I want to get blitzed, sit down in front of a big screen, and scope that shit out in one eight hour sitting, and I think that’s how I’m going to spend my birthday.
Well, if you’ve got biggish boobs like mine, their size and heft actually help prevent their untimely escape. They have a spot they want to hang out, if you’ve been supporting them well and are young enough. You may hear about “support” from commercials and friends like me who don’t care you’re a guy and we’re a girl and we’re supposed to spare you these details, and that’s what the clothing provides. You want a lot of pressure and security below the breast (not on) and a way to hold the structure up. Typically this manifests itself as inelastic fabric bound tightly below the breast, and straps around the shoulders (I like mine to cross my back for additional heft). Wire is sometimes used to additionally shape the structure. This is usually more than enough. In some tank tops, an elastic band around the chest and a slightly tighter cloth double layer is all it takes, but sometimes escape does happen there for me in those (there’s more shirt below it though, and I NEVER wear tanks without something over them!). The trick is to keep the fabric tight enough that the boobs press down on it, keeping it securely in place, but the garment is tight to the skin enough that they CAN’T fall through some imagined gap. If the garment is properly fitted, such a scenario is impossible.
For women with less voluminous chests, they’re not large enough to go anywhere anyway. Remember that they’re not detachable!
Boobs don’t GO sideways, they go down/forward, so side escape is silly. You’d have to have a garment that purposely put all pressure on the wrong areas to get them to go out the side. It would be a difficult structural problem, requiring all sorts of metal and elastic. And I think that would hurt!
The area that I have had difficulty is bras that clasp in the center. For some reason, I’ve never had one of those that didn’t just snap open in the middle of something important. I’ve had limited success with reattaching them with clothing, prompting one of my male friends to comment that he “wants to help but can’t figure out how or if it’s appropriate.” Back clasps are extremely secure, however, and you’ve probably had experience with that yourself. I’m not sure if they’re popular among women, as I don’t think everyone can easily fasten them with the bra in its proper place. I can easily reach and manipulate that area of my back, but I’ve heard of women clasping the bra either in another location such as the stomach, and sliding it on. That would explain why center-clasped bras even exist, as terrible as they are. Titillating though it may be for men, I find it extremely unpleasant to be unsupported.
/tmi
@ssjessiechan
I did not know these things! I have no problem hearing about this shit, I like learnin’ things, and I don’t have boobs. The only way I can learn about them is through rigorous study, and even with lots of observation and hands on study, I would not know these things that you mentioned!
That’s not TMI, thank you for sharing!